Have you ever seen Leave it to Beaver, the black and white fifties based sitcom that portrays the wholesome Cleaver family? The show stars Ward, the bread winning father; June, the beautiful and domestic housewife; Wally, the seemingly cool yet sometimes awkward teenager; and “the Beave,” the mischievous and curious little brother. While on the air, this great American fictional family served as a role model for the typical American family to emulate. The show endorsed upright moral principles, loving yet firm parenting skills, and promoted happy, healthy marriages, but times have changed in the forty nine years since the show went off the air. The majority of today’s families are either divorced or consist of single parents, and many children seem to rule the roost with cocky attitudes. However, despite these changes, my family, the Markers, have managed to stay more traditional. I come from a “Cleaveresque” type family; my parents, Mike and Cathy, have been married for forty three years and are more in love today than when they met. While I was growing up, my father worked and provided for my family, while my mother stayed at home to take care of me and my two older brothers. Like the Cleavers, they parented with love and instilled moral values in each of us. They were fair, yet firm when we were children, and have served as the model around which I have molded my adult life. This is not to say, however, that my family is perfect. Though the family dynamics and moral aspects of my childhood may have resembled that of black and white wholesome television, there were some distinct difference between June and Ward and Mike and Cathy. Personality wise, my parents are unique.
My father is an exceptional man. As a little girl in pigtails, I remember thinking that he was the smartest man I had ever met. Twenty five years later, I still believe that to be true. There is hardly a trivia question he cannot answer, and he is filled to the brim with intriguing, miscellaneous information. He works as a professor at a four year university where he imparts knowledge to others for a living. Do not, however, confuse his studiousness with dullness. He has a one of a kind personality, and it only seems to flourish with time.
Unlike Ward Cleaver, my father does not simply come home from work expecting to find peace and quiet by reading the paper, watching the news, and smoking cigars. My father has personality, and it is that personality that makes him so enjoyable. He is known in my family for his distinct and often hilarious qualities. One is buying in bulk. My father will buy anything in bulk, the more the better. Some of his favorite items to buy in bulk are clothes, especially if they are on sale. One year for Christmas, I received four pairs of overalls, all exactly alike in different colors. A few years later he bought me, my mother, and my sister-in-laws matching candy pink leather jackets (it was bad, I must admit). He decided that since the jackets were on sale and were such a good deal that he would go back to the store to get us the purple and green jackets, purchasing a total of nine altogether (really bad). A few years ago he decided it was time for a new car. He bought three cars in the span of about a month, two just alike. A few years later he purchased my brother’s car when the lease was up, and though he already had two trucks, he later completed his “car lot” with one more truck. That is a grand total of five vehicles. Did I mention my mom doesn’t drive, only him. These are just a few of the items that my father enjoys buying in multiples. It is also only one small aspect that makes him so unique and fun.
Another endearing quality that I love about my father is his love for everything western. Most men go through a mid life crisis when they get older and feel the need to buy a sports car. Not my father; instead, he turned into John Wayne. About five years ago to my mother’s dismay, he converted my old bedroom into a “cowboy room” after I moved out and he became proficient at twirling cap guns (a skill he is teaching my oldest son). He was even known to check the mail in his athletic shorts, western hat, cowboy boots, and gun holster. I think this love for cap guns and cowboys actually comes from his childhood memories of watching westerns on black and white television. And as Cleaveresque as my father may be, I hardly believe that Ward would ever buy a woman’s fashion belt simply because the color of the leather matched his gun holster.
These funny quirks are just the tip of the iceberg. My father is like a one man paparazzi, taking so many pictures that my family automatically poses when he walks in the room in anticipation of the picture that is sure to follow. His picture taking has even resulted in some family squabbles (Christmas Gate 08—but that is an entirely different story!) He has been known to buy candy bars and hide them in my mother’s dishes and even in empty Oat Bran cereal boxes so that others will not eat them. He has the gift of gab and can go on for hours about pretty much any subject, and he enjoys more than anything spending quality time with those he loves. This love is most evident when he is around his children. Despite the fact that I am thirty, have been married for eight years, supported by my husband and have a wonderful job, my father still feels the need to help me financially. He only recently stopped balancing my checkbook (make fun, that’s fine) and still will deposit money into my bank account or give me spending money occasionally. He gives freely to my brothers and our children as well. In fact, he would be a lot richer if he would stop giving all of us his paycheck! We try to convince him this is not necessary, but he does it out of love, not necessity. It is these qualities, along with so many very funny other ones, that make my father such a sweet, loving role model.
My mother is also filled with personality and compassion. I have always hoped to be as caring a mother to my children as she has always been to me. Like June Cleaver, she is an excellent homemaker, and although growing up my mother didn’t vacuum in pearls and heels, she did always have dinner on the table for my family when we arrived home from school each day. Unlike June Cleaver, her decision to stay at home with her family was not simply based on the notion that a woman’s place was in the home. Her role as stay at home mom was the result of an unfortunate eye disease known as retinitis pigmentosa (RP). At the age of thirty two, she began suffering from this genetic disease and has had to learn to cope with narrowing vision while also raising a family. Although she is not completely blind, she is very limited visually, cannot drive, and must be helped when navigating unfamiliar territories. Like June, her attitude is always cheery. She never complains about the often hilarious mishaps she finds herself in due to her RP. In fact, my family loves to get a chuckle from them. When I was younger, she hung a coat over a lady’s head because she could not see her sitting in the chair for which she was aiming. Another time she enthusiastically hugged a maintenance man that she mistook for my husband. At a restaurant, she once forced a lady, whom she thought was her friend, into giving up her box of leftovers only to later spot her actual friend standing in a completely different location. On another occasion, she stood in line at what she thought was the Wal-Mart customer service desk for forty-five minutes only to discover she had mistakenly been standing behind a life-size blow-up of Shrek. She has been known to show up in public wearing mismatched shoes or two different earrings. Despite how disheartening all of these things may sound, and trust me, these are simply a few of the funny stories she has to tell, she still manages to laugh at every funny story and take it in stride.
My mother’s determination and perseverance is like none other. Her outlook on life is always positive and I enjoy all of the time I have ever spent with her. As a teenager, I was excited to start driving so that my mother and I could go shopping by ourselves. Now that I am older, she helps me with my boys, and I confide to her my hopes and dreams and even hang out with her on the weekends. We usually end up laughing so hard when we are together that I swear I almost pee my pants! She is a great Nana, even if sometimes she puts a diaper on backwards or can’t find which end is up on the baby! She is the ultimate mom and friend, though not the type of parental friend that allows a child to run wild. Her abilities are amazing. She manages to keep an orderly house, provide multiple laughs for my family, and maintain loving friendships with her children, all while having fun doing it! She truly is a role model for moms that could give June Cleaver a run for her money.
June and Ward Cleaver made television history by portraying the “ideal” family. Their contribution to TV history portrayed wholesome moral values, family togetherness, and perfect parenting skills. Based on what the Cleavers stood for, my family is about as close to “perfect” as one could hope for. Obviously, nuclear families do not necessarily equal happy families, and no family is perfect, including mine. My family, like all others, is susceptible to conflicts and clashes, and unlike the Cleavers, not every disagreement in my house can be solved within a timely thirty minutes. Nonetheless, I was lucky enough to grow up in a home where fights were few and far between and love was expressed openly. I can only hope that one day my precious boys will think back to their home life with the same fondness that I feel for mine.
No comments:
Post a Comment